Before we get started let's clear one thing up masturbation is perfectly normal and healthy for both men comes with numerous ...

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How your Masturbation Technique Might be Ruining your Sex Life?

masturbation is the ultimate form of self-pleasure but a question I get asked all the time is how much is too much well I'm Dr Rena Malek urologist and pelvic surgeon and today I'm going to explain three ways that you can potentially harm yourself with masturbation if you're new here you will know that I'm very pro-masturbation it is a ultimate form of self-pleasure and it is safe when done appropriately and a great way to relieve stress sleep better and has a number of health benefits if you're curious to learn about those things and debunk those myths you might have heard about masturbation make sure you check out my video on seven myths of masturbation but today I'm going to talk about three things that could potentially hurt you if you're doing them during masturbation so the first one is something that was coined called traumatic masturbation syndrome and this was first coined and described by Dr Lawrence sank in 1998 and this was described as the habit of masturbating in a prone in fashion that means lying on your stomach or having your stomach facing a bed a pillow or a hard surface and patients who develop traumatic masturbatory syndrome or traumatic masturbation syndrome complained of symptoms of low sexual desire inability to orgasm or having issues with erections in fact there's very little data on this but we see it anecdotally in practice that some patients do experience this there was a study looking at almost 2 600 men who describe themselves as having premature ejaculation in order to identify if there were some habits related to them developing premature ejaculation they ask them a number of questions including what their masturbation techniques were and they also asked these as open-ended questions so a lot of surveys that you get reported on in the literature are closed and I mean they give you like four or five options to choose from but here they ask them like tell us about your masturbation practice and what they found was that people who describe themselves as having traumatic masturbatory behaviors like having masturbation in a prone position or rubbing through their clothes we're more likely to have issues with erections or erectile dysfunction the next thing is something that's commonly described as death grip so what exactly is that well there's no real medical term for death grip but it's been described as having a very firm or aggressive grip on the penis during masturbation and so in medical speak we describe this as habituation so basically what happens is your body gets used to having a certain amount of force or vibration or whatever it is so for women it may be using vibratory toys or for men it may be using a very firm grip and your body gets used to that and so it becomes more and more difficult to climax or have enjoyment or the same Sensation from your partner because you can't get that same level of stimulation and it can be actually like a very vicious cycle for example in a man who uses a firm grip during masturbation they can start become having reduced sensation in the penis and then they may need an even firmer grip to reach Climax and it becomes this vicious cycle as the grip needs to get firmer and firmer in order to get the same sort of simulation and so this has been described actually as what doctors call idiosyncratic masturbation method so an idiosyncratic style is essentially a style that cannot be replicated by a partner in this case for a man it's a female partner's mouth hands or vagina or it can even include a fantasy that is very difficult to replicate when with a partner so in a small study of 500 men who had what we call delayed ejaculation or difficulty achieving ejaculation or climax about 37 percent described having what we call idiosyncratic masturbation practices it can be more than just a grip right it can be the certain speed that you're using this certain place or position for example as we describe prone masturbation or it can be a certain item that you use every single time that can't be replicated in partnered sex and unfortunately this can be very difficult to talk about with your partner but before you start blaming yourself it's important to realize that there are other causes for changes in sensation in the genitals for both men and women and it's important to rule out medical causes so for men it can be a decrease in testosterone it can be due to certain medications like antidepressants I've made a video about that as well as videos about testosterone it can be to certain medical problems like diabetes or having injuries to the area it can also be due to having drugs on board or alcohol because those things can depress the nervous system making it hard to feel the same Sensations you would when you're not under the influence of those things also if you're doing a lot of sitting particularly during covet a lot of people were sitting in their home offices and not moving very much or if you're doing a lot of extensive biking that has also been shown to decrease sensation down below so what do you do if either of the first two things we talked about are happening to you and you know it's not a medical problem well number one you want to give masturbation a break try to stop for a couple weeks and let your body adjust to normal Sensations that you would normally feel and when you resume masturbation you want to try different modalities I tell a lot of people to incorporate lubricant in their masturbation because it still allows for very nice sensation but then also allows for more slipperiness and less intense friction that that you may be using previously you may want to avoid things like pornography and try to avoid the types of fantasies that we're using previously to get stimulation or get excited visually or mentally and you may want to actually try to use internal fantasies rather than relying on external fantasies that you may be reading or watching and lastly you may want to use hands instead of things like toys or vibrators that can provide a much stronger stimulation also it can be helpful to see a sexual therapist to talk about things like sensate focus and so what that is is actually focusing on the feeling of touch and pleasure when you're with your partner without the expectation of penetrative sex to kind of focus your brain on those things rather than the performance or the stress of not being able to reach climax the last thing that can be damaging particularly to men is if you have very aggressive masturbation techniques which may involve some bending of the penis that can lead to things like penile fractures any sort of bend that occurs to an erect penis can lead to what's called a penile fracture I made a couple videos about penile fractures but essentially they are a break of the lining of the erectile bodies of the penis that then cause your penis to sometimes you'll hear a pop and your penis will get very swollen and painful and that is a surgical emergency and must be treated immediately also if you're masturbating trading with a less than erect penis you have to be careful because that can sometimes cause injuries to the penis as well where you can get micro fractures or micro injuries that can lead to plaques and eventually cause curvature of the penis so otherwise if you're not having any of these problems and you're having a normal healthy masturbation practice and you're not having any problems having sex with your partner and you're still able to enjoy your partner as well as enjoy yourself then by all means please go ahead and continue masturbating it is healthy and wonderful way to express yourself pleasure but back to the question everyone's always asking me how much is too much well I wish I could tell you there was an exact number but there's not if you find that you're masturbating you know multiple times a week but you're still going to work doing all things you need to do being a good partner being a good parent whatever it is and it's not interfering in your day-to-day activities and it's not encompassing large amounts of time that you could be doing something else productive then it's totally fine to continue as you are if if you're starting to realize that maybe you prefer masturbation to other things like going out with your friends or hanging out with your partner then it's probably time to take a deep look at how often you're masturbating how you're masturbating what techniques you're using to masturbate and really check out how you can modify those and have a more fulfilling and enjoyable life and if you're curious about pornography make sure you check out my video on the pros and cons of pornography and if you're suffering from issues where you have problematic pornographies check out my video on porn addiction I hope you guys found this helpful as always you want to take care of yourself because you are worth it foreign [Music]

Dr.

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