welcome to the Reena Malik podcast um we are glad to have you we got another exciting AMA to do today first question is they're kind of overlap so I'm going to ask both at the same time so first part is what are some various Fourplay methods that I can start implementing and what are things that my partner can do to help stimulate me before sex all right so I don't know if this person is male or female but I'll just talk in general sure um so foreplay starts well be at the beginning of the date right or even before the date right foreplay starts in the morning if you're with a partner that you've been with all day like you can start foreplay as early as you know you deem appropriate and foreplay can be a simple as like having you know sort of uh nice exchanges where you chat with each other and you sort of flirt a little bit it can be a gentle touch here there just like a just a you know affectionate touch but whatever you and your partner are into and the most important thing is being able to know what your partner likes so every person's a little bit different and so in order to understand like what can you do for foreplay it's sort of like finding out what they enjoy like do they enjoy um sort of to take it slow and have uh have more anticipation or do they you know want you to get right into it and I think sort of figuring that out and talking about it and just saying like hey what are you into like what what do you like and so that you know and you can bring that to your experience with that person in the bedroom or wherever you're having sex I think that is super powerful so determining you know what they like what they want what they enjoy and then you know pay attention when you're trying different things like don't be afraid this is the time to play right sex and foreplay it's all fun as adults we don't play much but this is our time to play and so like if someone doesn't like something don't take it personally like just take note and don't do that next time and if they do like something a lot again make note of it so that you can incorporate in the next time you have sex but sex is something that you get better at and same thing with foreplay it's not like you're just going to meet a person everything's going to be great the first time you have sex yes sometimes maybe it is but often times it's not and you sort of have to work towards it and to learn you know what it is that they like what turns them on what gets them really hot and heavy so you can bring that to every encounter and always try to change it up right so the other thing is like don't you know you can get very comfortable doing the same thing the same script every time because it works really well but when you're in a long-term relationship novelty becomes really important because you sort of want to keep that excitement and that and that interest in each other going and it can be very easy to get lost in the routines of life and just find it to be very sort of mundane and instead of letting your sex life fall into that mundane rut try to just keep it interesting all right sounds good sounds good sounds like there's a little Playbook you guys could use there all right next question is my loads are way bigger when I masturbate than when I have sex with women why do you think that is this is from Rodolfo and Tampa all right Rodolfo so seam in volume or loads as you describe them are sort of variable dayto day and that can be for a variety of reasons it can be because maybe you are having more probably more common than anything else is how long it's been since your last ejaculation so the longer you wait the likely the more volumous your seamen volume is going to be I think that usually caps off at about 4 days and then it's really not that much different but if you delay then you're going to notice that your seaming volume is going to be you know a lot more robust than if you you know masturbate every day or have sex every day so that's number one number two is how well hydrated you are so if you drink a lot of fluids you'll notice that you're going to have a more robust seamen volume the other thing is how strong is your orgasm in terms of the pelvic floor muscles so sometimes you may be having a stronger orgasm and those muscles might be contracting more strongly and they may make it look like it's more volumous because there's more force behind it and so that could be a contributing factor you can do keegle exercises or exercise to strengthen the pelvic floor muscles particular the bubble cavernosus muscle to help really really sort of increase that force of ejaculation however that does tend to decline with age so when you look at the force of ejaculation um for a young man is usually 30 to 60 cm away whereas when they get older that drops down to about 15 to 30 cm and so sometimes in people who want to increase the force of their ejaculate you can do keegle exercises and find that it appears more volumous because more of it's coming out all at once there it is is keegle exercises hydration I like that I like that I think I'm I'm going to start doing keigle every time you say pelvic floor I'm going to be trained by the end of this if you guys are enjoying this AMA make sure to check out our membership at renam malik. supercast domcom where you can become a premium member ask your questions there and you guys get first dibs on having your questions asked here on the Amma and we want to be able to answer everyone's questions but clearly it's not feasible all the time and this allows you to get that opportunity and we greatly appreciate you so if you've enjoyed it check out the membership and as always we're going to take care of yourself because you're worth it